Transformations happen quickly. We were discussing birthdays – orange smiles and granny smith fangs are fun, but clowns are even better. He’d been pleading cheerily over the top of this: where was Superman and could he please sit at the table with us if he promised to be really, really good?
Mid-negotiation, he made a connection: ‘Tomorrow is the first of June!’ The tears came then with the barest of bare chin wobbles and a mist of gloomy dew. He looked distraught enough to panic, but we pressed anyway. ‘My birthday didn’t come,’ he whispered. ‘May is gone and my birthday didn’t come!’
Stricken by his distress, we spoke of unbirthdays and their specialness, cupcakes and secret superhero missions. But, we were shocked and when he calmed, we checked again. Good news: B-day is still a couple of months away. To say I’ve never seen a child beam that wide would be a lie, but it came pretty close.
It amazes me sometimes to see how little it takes to make a child smile. Where we, as adults, go to such lengths to hide our emotions, protecting and restraining ourselves with dangerous layers of subterfuge and denial, they thrive in the epicentre of emotion where the slightest touch can tip the balance and then nudge it back again. They’re not afraid to feel, until we teach them to be. Should we be taking lessons from them instead?
At 27, I don’t know that I’ll ever feel that strongly about my own birthday, but damned if I won’t fight to make each and every one a special one for those that do. If that’s you, keep the spirit. Parents, your kids are special. I know you know it, but hug your kids more, please. Thanks.